I LOVE YOU WHEN I HATE YOU.....

Yeah,
Hate is such a strong word we were told,
Unfortunately, I can't deny that that's how I feel.

Looking at you makes me uneasy...
Seeing you smile makes me uncomfortable...
I mostly detest passing places I've seen you pass...
And I enjoy showing off, as long as it's in your face...
I've got all you wanted, the rush is amazing...

There's no perfect description to how much I actually hate you; I literally have goosebumps thinking of ways to put you down under.

But do I really hate you?

All the places I wish we would go together; You'd go with her...
Most times I see you, I picture you holding me; But you're not...
When you smile, I imagine what you think about, and hope it's me; But it's not;
Or at least hope you'd smile with me; But you don't.
How can you even, you only know I exist when we are amongst our 'Real Friends'.

The places you'd pass, I shy away from passing, because why the hell was I not with you?
I've got all you would have wanted, but you do not want them with me.
And every time I remember that I hate you, I END UP LOVING YOU MORE...